.." No buts. You enjoyed it, and, you got paid," Tom said.Marie looked daggers at Tom. Her face softened, and she called him a bastard."Come on, Marie... it's not that bad is it?" Ruth asked."I wouldn't have done it if I had of know," Marie snapped."Sorry," Ruth apologized again, "We're going back down to the bar. See if there are any punters." You fuck for money?" Marie asked."Yes," Ruth admitted without any qualms and added, "Your welcome to come with us if you like."Marie dropped and shook her. Before sat down and began writing all this tonight, I always looked back and relived that first video that I like so much. I remember is this one video, (which was not a homemade video, ) but it was the very first video sex tape that Bill and I ever watched. It was a simple straight sex tape; it opened showing this young woman on her back naked. She was Oriental, (maybe Japanese) anyway I could see it so clearly as Kenny (the man fucking me earlier this afternoon) and I worked very hard to both. Stepping out of my panties, I stand up; my legs close together, as he motions for me to place my panties in the bag. My hands shaking, face bright red, thinking it cannot get any worse; I drop my panties in the bag. He steps back, asks me to look in the camera, and takes a picture. I look at the camera, looking displeased, as he takes more pictures. ?Spread your legs? he sternly orders. ?Spread? But why? I say, my voice shaking. Scared, of been sexually violated, knowing that I cannot complain. Yet, I’d still tossed and turned all night, my mind unsettled. I couldn’t stop thinking about Euphoria: what happened there, who I’d become for a brief moment. I liked anxiety-free ‘me’; I liked the carefree, shameless girl who’d had sex with a stranger in the shadows of the club. I wanted to be her again and, frankly, what was stopping me?Lightheaded, heart all aflutter, I mulled over that notion. But, as the lift slowed, my thoughts returned to more pressing sombre matters. University started.
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